It’s the most wonderful night (or in this case nights) of the year. WrestleZone Aberdeen Anarchy, it’s not until May sometime and as always I already have most of the card thought out, all of which will be wrong but indulge me for a moment while I explain how I would book a two night Aberdeen Anarchy…

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Night One

Mauler Murphy vs Shawn JOhnson

From what I’ve seen, read, and listened to, Mauler needs to get his teeth into a story to become MAULER Murphy. Now that we’ve hopefully seen the back of Tucker/Johnson, for the time being, this would be a way to both refresh Shawn and hopefully get Mauler to that next stage. It would start at Summerhill Showdown, Murphy, either in a match with, or a post-match, lays waste to Shawn Johnson. Powerbombs, steel chair, ramming into the ring post, whatever your mind desires. Doesn’t have to be a reason, Mauler could just want a victim, blames it on fans cheering for Shawn, the reason itself isn’t important to the story. Write off Shawn for a couple events while Mauler continues to destroy a Cysto, or bring up a couple of Andy Wild’s trainees so they can get a bit of in-ring time, or even The Super Executioner. Get to the Regal Rumble, Mauler throws out a couple guys, maybe have a stare down with Crusher Craib to set up something in the future. Shawn Johnson returns and eliminates Mauler. They brawl to the back. Job done.

It’s a set up seen so many times but often the simplest solutions are the best. Sets up Mauler Murphy and Shawn Johnson for Anarchy. Easy right? Add a no holds barred stipulation in and they can just go nuts.

wrestlezone tag team championships – foundation of the future (ryan riley & Brad Evans) (c) vs The rejected (Chris Archer & Mikkey Vago)

Summerhill Showdown, the night ends with The Foundation of the Future all holding gold (will explain more on that later). They beat Connor and Crusher in a rematch from Christmas Chaos (Riley holds the ropes to get the unfair advantage). Foundation of the Future win the rematch at Regal Rumble.

This one I’m not entirely sure of the set up, maybe Riley and Evans make a point to double team Archer and Vago respectively during the Rumble and they take exception to it, but a point would be a promo of Vago hosting the Mosh Pit with Zach Dynamite as the guest when Evans and Riley attack Vago during the show. It would be effective.

Bingo Ballance vs Connor Molloy

Following Bingo Ballance’s return at Halloween Hijinks, in the weeks building up to Anarchy he would put out a short video wanting a new face to step up to take him on at Anarchy. There’s no face/heel thing required just Bingo wanting to take on one of the young lads from WrestleZone to see if he can still hang with them. Connor Molloy responds. Match made.

mr p & evan young vs bryan tucker & ronan king

Mr P takes Evan Young under his wing, they have a squabble with an erratic Bryan Tucker who finds someone to bestow his wisdom on in Ronan King. It’ll be like two Dads trying to prove their son is the best.

wrestlezone tri-counties championship number one contendership – triple threat – crusher craib vs caleb valhalla vs andy wild

After Crusher’s loss of the tag team championships he sets his sights on making history once more. He’s won the Regal Rumble three times but nobody has won the triple crown in WrestleZone. He wants his shot. Following Caleb helping Alan Sterling regain the WrestleZone Tri- Counties Championship, Sterling eliminates Valhalla from the Rumble “by accident”. Valhalla puts out a challenge for the Tri-Counties Title. Andy Wild can say he never had a one on one rematch for the title and here’s the solution. Three big dudes battering each other to face Alan Sterling on night two.

scotty swift vs damien

Right so, after Zach Dynamite defeats Damien at Summerhill Showdown for the title. Swift comes out to raise Damien’s hand as a sign of respect for holding the title for over 700 days and through the pandemic. Damien whips his hand away and exits. Pre-Rumble Damien vows to win the Rumble and get his title back, but during the match itself Swift accidentally eliminates Damien. Damien blames Swift for taking away his opportunity and they have a backstage brawl at the training academy. Night one main event, lots of history to go behind this for a delightful video package. I’d even sweeten the deal and have Johnny Lions referee the match.

Night Two

Nathan North vs Ian Skinner

I’ve no other reason for this one other than it would be cool to see Nathan North return to WrestleZone and Ian Skinner make an appearance as he’s just great. Both are active on various forms of social media, there could be magic in the build up to it.

maddison miles vs emersyn jayne

Maddison Miles was due to be part of the Regal Rumble event before the world shut down. This would be a chance to get her on the show plus I’d never say no to an Emersyn Jayne match. Jayne could put out a promo saying that even while she’s not there she is always the main event empress and Queen of WrestleZone and nobody will change that. WZ management brings in Miles for Jayne to prove it.

WrestleZone tri-counties championship – captain alan sterling (c) vs caleb valhalla

Valhalla wins the triple threat on night one to finally get his hands on Captain Alan Sterling. Big Caleb doing Big Caleb things.

Lou King Sharp, Krieger, & Umar Mohammed vs The Outfit (Dino Del Monte & Ted O’Keefe), & Winston

With The Outfit back together and targeting Umar Mohammed, I can see Umar trying a couple tag team partners against The Outfit to no avail. I was trying to think of a team that would be absolutely hilarious and entertaining with Umar and it has to be Sharp and Krieger. The Outfit recruit Winston, another that was due to debut at the 2020 Regal Rumble, on their side and a six man tag is made.

Grado vs Joe Hendry

Certainly an out there pick but in lieu of getting “imports” in for Aberdeen Anarchy who would better than former Ring of Honor wrestler Joe Hendry and one of the biggest Scottish wrestlers going in Grado. This would be flat out entertainment but it could even come in with an edge of Joe Hendry wanting to prove he is the most entertaining Scottish professional wrestler ever and he HAS TO beat Grado to confirm that.

Undisputed WrestleZone Championship – Zach Dynamite (c) vs Aspen Faith

Don’t look at me like that. Zach Dynamite, with a little help, defeats Damien at Summerhill Showdown to win the Undisputed WrestleZone Championship. Foundation of the Future end the night with all the gold. Aspen has been teasing a WrestleZone return, even as far as pointing out the Foundation of the Future’s shenanigans. Aspen wins the Rumble, I cry, and books his main event place at Aberdeen Anarchy.

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So there you go, that’s what’s not going to happen at WrestleZone Aberdeen Anarchy this year.

Would be cool though.